Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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