Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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