So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize