Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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