He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
