We're facebook friends in real life
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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