My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
