All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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