Pappa wants mamma naked
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
