I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
