question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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