super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
