did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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