my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
vagina is talking i cant
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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