he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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