he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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