Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize