did you get engaged???
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
