I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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