Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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