Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Terrible idea I love it
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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