I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Fuck appropriateness.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
