have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
