Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Enjoy the penises
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
