I look better un-naked...
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
