Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
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