I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I supernannyed him into submission
Randomize
