Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
