I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
