discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
