im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
As shirtless as possible
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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