i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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