oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
