if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
