remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
