I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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