then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Randomize
