I wanna passion pit in your ass
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
it's like heaven, but drunker
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Randomize