No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
