just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
