I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
