Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize