Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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