I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
The chlamydia really affected his face.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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