my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
