I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
