oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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