3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
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