white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
