just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
